To whom this may concern,

Though we may seem like a nice choice to pull us into your squad, the truth is, you would be mistaken. We are shabby, lazy, and overall incompetent when it comes to accomplishing menial tasks that require minimum effort and dedication. To highlight some of our exploits, we have fired upon our own mates out of anger and ineptitude, and subsequently been annihilated by our own members in turn. In battles, we have a flawless record of bumping Tanks in the middle of large battles and creating havoc that has lost us wars. In order to simplify and hopefully clarify, you must realize that we are the pure embodiment of Murphy’s Law.

On the other hand, we inspire fear and are relentlessly vicious......with EOD-bots. We make our enemy fall at our feet, and though it be laughing, we find it a perfect time to strike. Have you ever been attacked by a ravenous gang of EOD-bots engaging on your position? “Who’s laughing now?!”, we ask.

Half of our corporation is gay by nature, and the other half like men. We are cantankerous and edgy, poorly groomed, and drunk most of the time we’re online. Our math is bad and our grammer is worse, which leads to numerous failed assignments and an enormous waste of our meager amount of luck. “Unreliable” would be the word to use to describe us if only we knew what that word actually meant. We are a boon to the enemy, and a ticking time bomb to our allies. Blessed with impeccable judgment, most of our members have a killboard that is similar to that of first-time players (but the noob ones...) Most importantly, though we are small in size, we can make quite a mess when we are fucked with, and you will never be able to get rid of us! Have you ever heard of herpes? Well – we are like herpes.

All that being said, do yourselves a favor and offer us a position within your squads. We are a greater danger to ourselves than we are to you (most likely), and will do everything in our power to avoid fucking up your day.

- BWFZ Crix Jericho (Diplomat)